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What is Asexuality?

A sexual orientation that refers to a person who experiences little or no sexual attraction and who chooses to call themselves asexual.

Asexuality exists on a continuum from people who experience no attraction or desire for sexual activities, to those who experience low levels, or only under specific conditions will they experience sexual attractions.

Ace is a common term used by individuals to refer to themselves as on identity that falls within asexuality.

QueerEvents.ca - Queer Flags - Asexual Flag Image

About our Flag

Created by Asexual Visibility & Education Network (2010)

The black stripe stands for asexuality; the grey stripe for grey-asexuality or demisexuality; the white for non-asexual partners and allies; the purple for the asexual community and the wider community as a whole.

What's the difference between Sexual & Romantic Attraction

When getting to know the Ace Umbrella it will be helpful to understand what the difference is between sexual and romantic attraction.

For many of us, these two concepts are so intertwined we forget sexual and romantic attraction are two different types of feelings and experiences. Our individual desires for each type of attraction influences what we look for with respect to experiences and interactions in a relationship.

 

Sexual Attraction

The desire for sexual contact or relationship with another person. This type of attraction can manifest overtime as relationships grow. However sexual attraction can also happen quite quickly.

Romantic Attraction

The desire for an emotional connection with another person. This type of attraction often evolves slowly over time a may involve a casual relationship or friendship that grows with time.

When someone refers to the butterfly feelings, this is romantic attraction.

 

Asexuality Quick Facts

Just a few things you need to know about Asexuality.

  • Asexuality is a sexual orientation not a gender identity.
  • Asexual people can also be heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, etc., while still being asexual.
  • Asexual means a lack of sexual attraction, and does not reflect on a persons sexual experiences, knowledge or interests.
  • The 'A' in LGBT2QIA represents Asexual, Aromantic & Agender.
  • Ace is a common nickname for Asexuality
  • Unlike celibacy, which is a choice to abstain from sexual activity, asexuality is an intrinsic part of who a person is, just like any other sexual orientation.

Myths about Asexuality

There's so much misinformation about our Asexual friends, lets clear a few things up

  • Asexuality is a choice - Nope, Just like other sexual orientations including heterosexuality, homosexuality or bisexuality, Asexuality is not a choice.
  • Asexuals cannot form deep or meaningful relationships - Asexuals feel the full spectrum of romantic feelings as anyone else, they just have a lack of sexual attraction.
  • Asexuals don't ever want to have sex - Although for some this is true, there are many asexual individuals who do have sex.
  • Asexuals just haven't met the right person - This is similar to telling a queer person they just haven’t met the right person of a different gender. Any sexual orientation, including asexuality, is an individual experience.
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Wondering about Pronouns? Don't worry, QE got you covered with our Pronouns 101

What's the difference between Asexual and Aromantic?

Although similar there is a difference between these two identities.

Asexual

A sexual orientation that refers to a person who experiences little or no sexual attraction and who chooses to call themselves asexual.

Asexuality exists on a continuum from people who experience no attraction or desire for sexual…

Aromantic

Experiencing little or no romantic attraction to others and/or has a lack of interest in romantic relationships/behavior. Aromanticism exists on a continuum from people who experience no romantic attraction or have any desire for romantic…

Terms Related to Ace Umberlla

  • Asexual

    A sexual orientation that refers to a person who experiences little or no sexual attraction and who chooses to call themselves asexual.

    Asexuality exists on a continuum from people who experience no attraction or desire for sexual activities, to those who experience low levels, or only under specific conditions will they experience sexual attractions.

    Ace is a common term used by individuals to refer to themselves as on identity that falls within asexuality.

    Quick Definition

    A person who does not feel the need to have sex very often, if at all

    Everyday Use

    I'm asexual but I still enjoy going on dates.

  • Aromantic

    Experiencing little or no romantic attraction to others and/or has a lack of interest in romantic relationships/behavior. Aromanticism exists on a continuum from people who experience no romantic attraction or have any desire for romantic activities, to those who experience low levels, or romantic attraction only under specific conditions, and many of these different places on the continuum have their own identity labels.

    Quick Definition

    A person who is aromantic experiences little to no romantic attraction to anyone.

    Everyday Use

    Sally is an aromantic bisexual. She feels sexual attraction to two genders, but does not feel romantic attraction

  • Allosexual

    Someone who experiences sexual attraction.

    Quick Definition

    Some asexual-spectrum people use the term “allosexual” to describe anyone who is not asexual, demisexual, or a gray-asexual; i.e., people who regularly experience sexual attraction/desire for others. The prefix “allo-” simply means “other,” so allosexual is a descriptor for someone who is sexual toward other people. The term "allosexual" helps eliminate the idea that being "asexual" is abnormal.

     

    Everyday Use

    I think Jace is sexually attracted to Jon. He must be allosexual then.

  • Akiosexual

    A person who experiences sexual attraction but does NOT want it reciprocated under ANY circumstances. Also known as Lithosexual,

    Quick Definition

    An akiosexual person does experience sexual attraction, but they don’t want the attraction returned or for anyone to be attracted to them. 

    If the attraction is returned, their attraction usually fades.

    Everyday Use

    Krys is akiosexual. They were attracted to Tina but not since Tina tried to make out with them.

  • Cupiosexual

    A person who does not exhibit sexual attraction towards anyone under any circumstances, but is willing to engage in sex or sex like activities with others and/or have sexual relationships with someone.

    Quick Definition

    Cupiosexuality is apart of the asexual community. It refers to a person who is not sexually attracted towards anyone under any circumstances, but is willing to engage in sex or sex like activities with others and/or have sexual relationships.

    Imagine that you feel neutral about a certain food - let us say cake for the sake of an easy example. Now, let's say you are hungry and you open the fridge and see a piece of cake. There is no other food in the fridge. You eat the piece of cake because you're hungry, but you feel indifferent about the piece of cake (it is not your favorite food but at the same time you don't not like it).

    Everyday Use

    I describe myself as cupiosexual.

  • Demisexual

    A person who requires an emotional connection with someone before feeling any type of sexual attraction.

    Demisexuals will often know someone and have developed a romantic relationship before engaging in any type of sexual activity.

    Quick Definition

    An emotional connection is required before becoming sexually attracted to another person.

    Everyday Use

    I'm far more attracted to emotional connection than physical attraction.

  • Aegosexuality

    A disconnection between oneself and a sexual partner/object of arousal; may involve sexual fantasies, or arousal in response to erotica or pornography, but lacking any desire to be a participant in the sexual activities.

    Aegosexual (formally known as Autochorissexual) is a sexual orientation found within the asexual umbrella. It was coined by Anthony Bogaert in 2012. He used the term "autochorissexual", however, the community feels that this term pathologizes the identity.

    Quick Definition

    Aegosexuals might have a sexually appealing fantasy, but they don't find it appealing in real life.

    Everyday Use

    John likes the idea of sex, but does not actually want it.

  • Apothisexual

    Someone under the Asexual umbrella who is sex repulsed. some apothisexuals, they are averse to the idea of engaging in sex themselves, but are fine with sexual activity that does not involve them. Others may be repulsed by the idea of sex in general. Those who are apothisexual typically do not seek out sexual relationships.

     

    Quick Definition

    Someone who finds sex and/or sexual content unsettling and perhaps even disgusting. Like any sexuality, there are often variations on this. Some may find other having sex okay, others are repulsed by any mention of sex even if it doesn't relate to themselves.

    Everyday Use

    Carin feels nauseious with unexpected sex scenes in movies, she's apothisexual.

  • Grey-asexual

    Someone who typically does not experience sexual attraction but from time to time will be attracted to another person.

    This term falls under the Asexual (Ace) Umbrella, This is a catch term for anyone who falls in the 'grey' area between sexual and asexual, this term has also been used for those who fall under the aromantic spectrum.

    Quick Definition

    Typically experiences romantic attraction but once in awhile will experience sexual attraction

    Everyday Use

    It's not often I feel sexual attraction towards another person.

  • Ace

    A sexual orientation label referencing asexuality. Sometimes called the "Ace Umbrella" to represent the wide spectrum of asexual identities and experiences.

    Quick Definition

    A popular nickname for a person who is asexual.

    Everyday Use

    I'm an active member of the ace community.

  • Cupiogex

    Someone who is sexually exclusively attracted to the same sex, but is willing to participate in sexual activities with other genders/sexes (despite no sexual attraction for them).

    Quick Definition

    Part of the cupiosexual community. Someone who is sexually exclusively attracted to the same sex, but is willing to participate in sexual activities with other genders/sexes (despite no sexual attraction for them).

  • Abrosexuality

    An individual whose sexuality is fluid. While a person's sexual identity can shift in some way throughout their life, an abrosexual person's sexuality may change more frequently, over the course of hours, days, months, or years. It is often considered to be the sexuality equivalent of genderfluid and part of the asexual spectrum.

    The timing of the fluctuations is different for every person; for some the fluctuations may be erratic and for others they may be regular. The sexualities that a person fluctuates between also varies. Some abrosexual people may be fluid between all sexualities, while others may only be fluid between a few.

    Quick Definition

    Abrosexuality is the fluency of sexual preference, much like genderfluid but with which gender(s) you are sexually attracted to.

    Everyday Use

    I don't think I ever felt comfortable defining myself by one sexuality but then I realised I was abrosexual.

What is Aromantic?

Experiencing little or no romantic attraction to others and/or has a lack of interest in romantic relationships/behavior. Aromanticism exists on a continuum from people who experience no romantic attraction or have any desire for romantic activities, to those who experience low levels, or romantic attraction only under specific conditions, and many of these different places on the continuum have their own identity labels.

QueerEvents.ca - Queer Flags - Aromantic Flag Image

About our Flag

Created by - Cameron Whimsy (2014)

The green and light green represent aromanticism and the aro-spectrum; The white stripe represents friendship/platonic and aesthetic attraction/queerplatonic relationships/family, the importance and validity of all non-romantic relationships and feelings and non-romantic forms of love etc.; the black and grey stripes represent  the sexuality spectrum - acknowledging aro-aces, aromantic allosexuals, and everything in between.

 

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